More 2 years later – another death

2 yrs. ago, as I said, my dad died, but while I was up there; well, let’s start back, actually 2 yrs. before that I had gotten my dad the VA Aid and Attendance to pay his grandson, who he had gotten to move in with him to take care of him, so my husband’s aunt had wanted me to try to get it for his uncle for their grandson, who had moved in with them, for the same thing but I had not been able to get their financial information that comes in at the end/beginning of the year before I’d had to leave regarding dad 3 days after Christmas and then not getting back in time either after the first of the year with dad’s passing on January 7, then the services, etc., plus taking care of business and all. But I had also been in contact with one of those companies that helps you, since he didn’t really have a relationship with a veterans service officer like my dad did, although I had gotten his discharge papers from the local one but he had insisted to me that they would have to come in to do the rest,  – unlike dad’s, who went to his house – which they weren’t able to do, so she ended up calling me while I was there. Having said that, when I got back it turned they had at least gotten home health/physical therapy for him while I was gone, except she was thinking I had gotten it for them while I was away – no….although apparently it was somewhat through someone of the same name, which did cause some confusion at first. But, no, turned out she had done it herself, but the papers that had come in while I was gone had gotten taken for taxes so we weren’t able to get anything done regarding that but since they had the home health they weren’t that concerned about it anymore then, especially considering the fact that actually their grandson hadn’t been there with them anymore for a while, actually already when I’d left,  by then anyway and actually wasn’t going to be for a while and they were still somewhat able to manage by themselves with the help they’d gotten, so….

However, that help played out but we were able to get it replaced, so….

Then grandson came back but the papers still got taken for taxes again, even though I was supposed to be notified but she forgot; it was so different, they’d just been needed for taxes for so many years, but grandson ended up leaving again, on her birthday, and they were still able to somewhat manage with the help they had, then grandson came back again and was a big help when his grandfather would fall; aunt couldn’t manage that or get him out of bed when he couldn’t get himself out and was the one to call 9-1-1 when grandfather got confused re his pain medication or else just got in so much pain that he took so many he basically overdosed and had to be taken to the hospital. But without a source of income he had to get a job, just had to learn to start carrying a wallet. Having said all this, to an extent, to say he’s about 10 yrs. younger than dad’s grandson when he moved in with him; when he was his age, he didn’t carry one either. So he would lose his cards and not be able to find them or else just mislay them in his room so asked me to help him find them one night after he got off work but that put me there I guess really too late to be there with aunt already in bed and shouldn’t be there with just uncle up, so a family member asked me to leave. Now this was about the time again for the financial information to come in again but I had made contact with the local – well, not the actual county but the next one over – veterans service organization re the A&A and they had more stringent requirements that I still didn’t think we could meet; maybe we could all along and there were other issues but anyway was able to begin anyway and found that some things had already been set in place that she either didn’t know or didn’t remember and I began to be told that it would be taken care of by someone else; didn’t know how when I sure hadn’t been able to find a way, even beyond just having the actual documentation; I knew the information, that their income was too high; contrary to popular opinion of how it should be for our veterans, it’s still a means based program and my dad qualified but they didn’t, at least not without doing the same thing his VSO did, which could possibly be done, but I hadn’t been able to get it done but it was interesting that on a day she had called and asked me to come see her and I had an opportunity to do so was the very day she got the documentation, again, unknown, or at least unremembered, that it had all been done; the question now just was how? which we found out, but wasn’t for grandson, since, once again, he wasn’t there, but not for long that time; actually hadn’t been gone long and actually had been there when it had all gotten started, so….somewhat wonder how much that plays into things; he knew there were some things going on; possible if things had gone different?….

anyway he came back just a little over a week ago – on a Sunday night – got his car back that he’d just bought right before he left – had a wreck, possible malfunction of some sort that apparently got taken care of fairly quickly, car only in shop a day – called on Wednesday on his cell, stepped outside, lost signal or at least lost call for some reason, didn’t call back and one of those always haunting things, I didn’t either, at least not until later and there were other issues then, then life rocked on another couple days, until…

saw a post on social media from his mom that the unthinkable had happened

that he had passed away, was found on Saturday morning; hm….

About donnainthesouth

I'm a transplant, born up north but raised in the middle, now I'm down here where you don't see too many snowflakes; I'll probably post just about as often (here at least)
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