2 Yrs. ago

And I had just realized/remembered it was a Saturday – the day before Easter – because we left the little/big one with a cousin who was having an Easter egg hunt for all the littles – what triggered that – taking her to the mall this year to see the “Easter” bunny – why in quotes – because it wasn’t white so she didn’t want to have anything to do with him because “Easter” bunnies are white. But actually what’s somewhat even stranger is this wasn’t until Tuesday while the actual anniversary was Monday – didn’t even think about it when rescheduled a medical procedure from the snow; wonder why and then even with all the signs up for Easter egg hunts, but last Saturday, not this one – wonder about that – these were churches, so are they now trying to separate the secular from the religious – does seem rather “unsacred” to be hunting “Easter” eggs while Jesus is in the tomb but I supposed how appropriate(?) to send ours – not Easter eggs – but our little one –  to him, but then thinking not right to send to him when he can’t do anything – but am glad to know he’s not really still there, just, in many ways, wish we could have had a resurrection. And guess how appropo that while at the medical procedure a small bunny had gotten in that they’d shut up in the board room so were trying to catch while there so asked if I could take home to little miss big so they got a box and taped it up in with some water while I got taken care of then couldn’t believe neither of the “boutique” pet shops had rabbit food; had to go to basically the big box pet store, where, apparently, you don’t get just pellets anymore; got some forage mix, which is probably better and she even checked him out for me, unlike the clinic that was there; they don’t do rabbits either – and they had some plastic Easter eggs with some cute little stuffed animals in them that I picked up for all the littles while at it then took to them, but without the cage that I wasn’t even sure we had, thought they had it, from where they’d had a rabbit before, that I cannot remember, sorry, but hub reminded me it had been left on our picnic table – when, what kind of weather, by who? – and came home to find it, not gone; no, that’s what happened to this one – no, there but gone, right? got it, yes, it expired on us while we were gone, so guess that was another loss of something that had been gotten to make up for the other one – or try and was helping so this sure didn’t, but part of the move that has – now why they didn’t bring this one over here while they left, which I’d thought they were going earlier anyway or why they put it out on the porch, though why we put this on the picnic table; you think they’ll enjoy the fresh air – but when got back, box didn’t appear to have been moved, even “still” taped up or had it be re-taped but no bunny so now would it have gotten out – now, granted, other little girl had been there when took it – part of why they didn’t go earlier, although rather interesting how she – mom – had been hurting just then, thought she’d been looking for a bunny for big little but of course a pet, while this one was a wild one, in that sense, so already talking about rabies and such – anyway so had called for somebody to come get the kids so dad took off work early to do so, so she told him about it but would he/they have come back and gotten it while they were gone? mom says they don’t have it but….they haven’t been over there; thankfully, she doesn’t seem too upset about it; she seems to be doing better with all of it; she made a comment about sissy being up in heaven;
mom had said something about going to her grave but then certainly wasn’t done with everything going on but usually that would be top on the list; still find it interesting they were going after a bed; why? to replace the one they had they she said wasn’t working when this one seemed to be just the same, with the exception, found out, though not sure she knew this ahead of time, that it’s shorter, as in there’s more room between the frame and bottom of the headboard itself for the bedding to fit between rather than just up again, to hold it better so maybe won’t slide down like what was happening, which seemed to be more important right then, which, I know, if you find something like that have to get it right then and could possibly have been because just happened to fall on son’s day off this time and he’s not been able to bring himself to ever go at all but then when brought up yesterday in the midst of the “Easter” bunny trip, if went, wanted to go to the town the opposite way to get flowers to put on, when I was thinking just a balloon like have gotten before but after the “Easter” bunny incident then she got her mind on Easter egg hunts like apparently she took her to last year, since we know now wouldn’t have been the year before but they seemingly didn’t/aren’t having it again, was a sign up but for somewhere else and last weekend, so we seemingly missed most of them and then yesterday was Wednesday and she wanted to go to church with us, so just mom home this time; she, somewhat surprisingly, didn’t want to come this time to the house, but then we went right by the grave and still didn’t do anything or even think about her; why? or maybe I shouldn’t say think about her, actually maybe that’s why we didn’t go; we were in town in the first place for her to see her therapist and believe she told him, so maybe then all she could handle, maybe going before was instead of or because needed the therapy, whole point to try to not have it on mind all the time because seems to think that’s the cause of all the problems that have, so…

2 yrs. ago 3 days ago – hardest thing she’s ever done but says she has peace in her decision for her, that she’s out of her suffering and pain, but still misses her and has to deal with the loss every day; see the pdoc in couple weeks – see what happens then


About donnainthesouth

I'm a transplant, born up north but raised in the middle, now I'm down here where you don't see too many snowflakes; I'll probably post just about as often (here at least)
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