The end of an era

Most of my posts have been about my oldest son and our negotiations with various governmental entities but this one starts the navigations of my daughter-in-law so maybe my title should be the beginning of an era but it came to an end, hence, so…

She began her journey when her mother fell ill so she was placed in a group home. For whatever reason this started her down a road that did not bode well; however, for well or ill, when she reached 18 she had not been deemed severely ill so was released, to – what? a home she didn’t have any more, for her mother was still ill; somewhat a grandmother’s house but she was busy taking care of her mother – and, yes, maybe she should have been able to help at that point, but that’s somewhat another story – so she wound up at an aunt’s – now, again, why not either one of the aunts who had a rather stable situation – who was a single non-working mom living off her child support with her cousin who was doing the same in a HUD-subsidized house with them paying the utilities as well, receiving Food Stamps and Medicaid – your tax dollars at work! But even that apparently wasn’t enough. Oh, wait, they received the money for the utilities in cash rather than them being directly but do you think they used it to pay them? Ha! Nah, they just let them be cut off, so then they were evicted from their HUD-subsidized house but does that matter? Not if your mom has a basement you can move into! in her new house she just got that she’s renting to own with her husband on disability.  But soon to be no backyard for the owner conveniently forgot to tell her the state is putting the by-pass through it! Anyway if that doesn’t work she’ll just go live with her mother-in-law – yes, she got married along the way when her boyfriend got out of jail for selling crack, a felony, but shh! don’t tell ’em cause he can’t live in the HUD-subsidized house and neither can you if you’re gonna live with him – but mom teaches the GED classes down at the jail and cousin/aunt can always get an apartment in the projects, which, btw, is where grandparents and mom live as well. Now, grandad is on disability as well but I’ll give him somewhat of a pass cause he did have a car fall on him while working at the local junkyard – ouch! – and has been hassling over a settlement for years now. Oh, and mom is as well but when your whole right side is paralyzed from the stroke you had, I’ll give her one, too. And grandma can even have some for taking care of them, if she would, that is, and I guess she does somewhat but doesn’t really want to but doesn’t want to give it up – or I guess I should say didn’t or maybe that even turned out not to be that true – happened, regardless, anyway, since mom passed away, though she has been seen at the local food give-away place since – however, it’s private not govt – along with great-grandma who also lives in the elderly/disabled HUD-subsidized apartments when great-granpa is not in rehab when she lives with the daughter who has the basement that her daughter lives in. That’s when it gets crowded and daughter moves out or is that when other daughter moves in or is that when both daughters move in together in the projects. Oh, the gov’t wheel keeps turning!

Anyhow, they didn’t care where daughter-in-law went when she turned 18 and they took everything away from her that she’d had all her life – her disability check that her mother had gotten for her for her asthma she was diagnosed with when she was 2 – at least she’s not on 3 inhalers a month. Now I’m not making any judgements about that but when it’s all you’ve known and it’s just pulled out from under you without warning…along with your Medicaid, all the medical insurance you’ve ever known that was providing you with all the health care you understood you needed for, like, your asthma, and the diabetes you’ve been diagnosed with  And the biggie, the mental illness you’ve also been diagnosed with, but not severe enough to be allowed to continue having the means to treat it. So now what?

Well, let’s see, if you follow in the steps you see before you, you can always find some guy, get pregnant, have a kid, then you can on the gov’t dole that way; get your Medicaid, hence your health insurance back, and be able then again to get your medical treatment.  Sounds like a plan, right?

Except, in your case, the guy you meet happens to be my son, who’s found himself back in his mom’s hometown. Oh, except, right at the time you meet him, you luck out, cause it’s just at the time he get a big income tax refund that he can use to provide you a place to live – of your own – right?! yay! – I got my own now! see – aunts, cousins! I can do it, too! – never mind the fact that this guy’s supposed to pay his dad back for his car with that refund. Oh, that means he’s got a car, too! Now I realize that’s not your fault; he didn’t tell you that, cause he wanted a place of his own, too. He’s been living with his grandparents. And I guess all this goes back to his stint with the gov’t, which he had to work for, being in the National Guard, which you, of course don’t want him to do because you’re afraid he might get shipped off to some place like Iraq or Afghanistan.


About donnainthesouth

I'm a transplant, born up north but raised in the middle, now I'm down here where you don't see too many snowflakes; I'll probably post just about as often (here at least)
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